I can’t.

I wish I could stop thinking about you.

I can’t.

You video recorded music I enacted. You lost the tag in the ocean – but saved the icon. You made us into something so much more than either of us dreamed to be. And as I sat under the stars with you, swaying in that hammock questioning how life could ever be this good, I realized: life will never be this good again.

Now I’m left here, lonely and alone, absent of your voice, your lips, your touch – I feel as though I’ve missed out on so much of life.

If I knew how to reach you, I would. If I knew how to write and tell you how much I cared, I would send the note. I would show you everything I wrote. I would care and love and dote…

But I told you to not speak to me. I told you to not write me; do not call me; do not contact me in anyway. And my god – you’re a good listener.

And now I’m miserable. Since my eyes are closed, my heart’s arrested both of us.

Wake up. Wake up, wake up…