Seeing you while I walk down the sidewalk isn’t easy. The energy and fluster of a moment’s glance is overwhelming. All it takes is the shape of your face, the sweep of your hair, and the outline of your aura to completely derail my existence.
I can’t think. I can hardly see. It takes my complete attention to simply pull the next breath. Blood boils inside of me, filling every crack and crevice I didn’t know existed as a nervousness overtakes my psyche. I stumble as my knees shake. My heartbeat jumps to a sprint, and my soul leaves my body. I see myself from the third person, and I feel awkward, ashamed, and abandoned.
I wonder if you saw me, too. I wonder if you saw her. I wonder what you’re feeling, how you’ve been, and how you’re getting along. I wonder what you’ve been doing, who you’ve been seeing, and how you’ve been passing your days. I wonder if you think about me. I wonder if you know how much I think about you.
Pondering the past doesn’t pay for the present. Life’s about choices, and I made a snap choice to forego the life I could have shared with you. Nonetheless, I can’t disregard the emotional reaction I felt for several hours after milliseconds of accidentally taking you in. A simple mistake; a combination of fates; or a coincidence of convenience. No matter how much I regret the loss, fear the future, or miss our laughter, I can’t modify what’s occurred. I can’t change what I’ve done.
The pig is slaughtered. The sprout is burned.
Dream Chase Live 